Boyfriend: The lack of nicotine is making me want to eat everything everywhere forever.
Me: *leer* *I* got something you can eat.
Boyfriend: No you don't actually.
Me: .... *look down, look at him, look down, look at him* I did the last time I checked.
Boyfriend: Oh! I thought you meant wang.
Me: No, that'd be 'I got something you can suck on'.
Boyfriend: Ah, my mistake.
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