Me: My foot's still swollen...
Boyfriend: So you wanna try that bloodletting now?
Me: *stare* NO! Let's not, and never say that we did.
Boyfriend: Oh, we'll do it the sane way...
Me: If you say "with leeches" I'll hit you.
Boyfriend: No, you heat up an exacto knife on the stove, and then let it cool down, and wash the area in alcohol, then just stab it with the knife!
Me: Alright, but let's do it on YOU first.
Boyfriend: Nah, my feet are sensitive.
Me: My foot has been swollen for a WEEK and it all hurts just to TOUCH! What do you think my foot is?
Boyfriend: Big?
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