Mangnish Weekends - It was a hilly weekend, apparently...

Boyfriend: Cuando cuesto mi bano?
Me: "When hill my bathroom," is what you just said.
Boyfriend: Esposa... no wait, esposo... maybe.. I don't know anymore.
Me: EsposA is wife, esposO is husband.
Boyfriend: Ah, that's good to know... I'll forget it again.

Mangnish Weekends

Me: *power leveling in Mother* Pfft, ONE starman...
Boyfriend: And as a wise man once said, "Mi cuesto perro."
Me: ... You said 'cuesto' right?
Boyfriend: Uh huh.
Me: ... So that's... "My dog hill..."

It's good for your colon!

Me: I'm gonna take some of this yogurt and put it on this piece of pie...
Boyfriend: Mmm Poop pie.
Me: ... Why do you have to ruin everything beautiful?
Boyfriend: It's a hobby of mine!

He doesn't sound very convincing...

Boyfriend: *reaches towards my head*
Me: ... *leans away* What are you doing?
Boyfriend: Trying to love you!
Me: ... By snapping my neck?
Boyfriend: No, by grabbing your face!
Me: ... *lean away further*
Boyfriend: Because when you love someone, sometimes you just have to grab their face and shake.
Me: ......
Boyfriend: You know, you grab them good and tight, and then shake them really hard... with, you know... caring...
Me: Go away from me, creepy man.

That would be one HELL of a quincenera...

Boyfriend: Everyone! Break out the Gumbi costumes and the cream cheese, we're having a quincenera!

It makes sense? I guess?

Me: *talking about a video game* I swear to God it sounds like she's saying "mountain ranch"
Boyfriend: That's where they grow mountains. It's a really slow process. Sometimes they get sick though, and become canyons, but you know, they find places for them. Sometimes they never get bigger than speed bumps... those are mountain eggs, you know.

In all fairness... he's probably right.

Boyfriend: As a wise man once said, "He who lives by the puddi, dies by the puddi."
Me: *stares at him*
Boyfriend: I'll probably die by the puddi.