Friday, April 19, 2013

On People Who Don't Want To Handle Live Lobsters

Boyfriend: Dude, get over it. All of your food has been alive. Even your Cheetos. Especially your Cheetos.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Overheard from AngeliqueDaemon on her way home:

Girlfriend: There's nothing to do in an airport bar.
Boyfriend: Nothing you'd want to do, anyway. All you can really do is pick up Airport Bar Skanks, which are the lowest form of Bar Skanks besides your mom.

Friday, August 31, 2012

I DON'T think that's how it works..

Me: *looking at teeth in a little mirror*
Boyfriend: Don't worry, it'll fall out soon.
Me: *confused blink*
Boyfriend: Your tongue.
Me: O_O
Boyfriend: Then you'll grow your ADULT tongue! ^^

Friday, August 17, 2012

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

I disagree...

Me: That's not technically cursive.
Boyfriend: Your letters are connected! That means they're FANCY!

Friday, July 27, 2012

I don't think they bleat...

Me: I'm hungry... but I'm lazy...
Boyfriend: Quick! Start bleating like an elk! Maybe one will come feed you!
Me: ... WHAT?!

Monday, June 18, 2012

... What?

Boyfriend's brother: Fuck you and your fancy koala money.
Boyfriend: I LIKE fancy koala money, because it's plastic!
Boyfriend's brother: Well that IS fancy.
Boyfriend's father: You gotta watch koala's, because they have poisonous barbs on the ends of their tails.