Boyfriend: I should have killed you.
Me: What?!
Boyfriend: I said I love you.
Me: No you didn't! You said you should have killed me! Not only do you want me dead, you're lying to me! *sniff* I don't know what's worse!
Boyfriend: But that's what love is! What did YOU think it was?
Me: Being honest and NOT wanting someone dead!
Boyfriend: ... Yeah, I can see how that would work too.
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