So if you're keeping score, this is fat, crazy, and now retarded that he's called me...

Me: *leans over and bites boyfriend on shoulder*
Boyfriend: *laugh* That's funny, because I was just reading a story about a retard biting someone too.
Me: ............ *stare*
Boyfriend: .... *blink* Oh, no, I don't think YOU'RE a retard.